Wednesday, August 31, 2011

i am...

missing the best friend.

wanting to be in lake powell still.

wanting to meet new people.

bored at work.

wanting change.

needing a "pick me up".

not feeling good inside.

wanting to move out so bad.

needing a friend to talk to about stuff.

wanting to play with my little half sisters.

wanting ice cream.

wanting to be at the gym working my butt off.

missing dancing everyday. so much.

wanting a crazy girls night with my few girls that are left here.

needing a heart to heart.  with anyone.

p.s. lake powell post coming soon.

Saturday, August 20, 2011


its called skype.  its my new best friend.  well kinda. i talk to my bestie on it now since she is away at college.  i sure am missing that girl.  i love her so much and i am so happy for her.  we just talked for 40 minutes while i am at work.  people probably think i'm a crazy girl talking to myself.  oh well:)

"God made us best friends because our parents couldn't handle us as sisters."

Friday, August 19, 2011

break time.

i'm in desperate need of a break from life.  and guess what i get next week?? you got it, a break from life!  i get the chance to go to Lake Powell with Lori (birth mom) and all her family.  i'm stoked.  it will be a blast!  i will be meeting a lot of new people.  how exciting! and a little over whelming as well.  but this is just what i need right now.  can't wait:)

hope i get a sun tan.

its a favorite thing of mine.

as you may or may not know, i work at a kiosk in the mall.  its called Minky Couture.  but this post isn't about that.  this post is about my love for "people watching".  its the best thing ever.  one of the main reasons why i like my job.  at the mall, you see the weirdest kind of people... not a lie. 

some examples:

-the weird looking couples:  big girl with little guy.(how do they cuddle? he's gonna be squished..)  tall girl with short guy.(just doesn't look right.)  cute girl with not so cute guy.(girl, you can't settle!)  cute guy with not so cute girl.(hello!! i'm single!)  or my favoirte, two guys or two girls holding hands(no comment).  awesome. 

-a boy wearing high heels.  awesome dude.  he walked better in them then some girls i know. pretty sad if ya ask me.

-the people that i see and i want to ask them if they got dressed in the dark.  or maybe their 3 year old sister dressed them today?  or that boy who might have accidently put on his little sisters pants... too tight! 

-i notice hair all the time, since i'm in hair school.  what are some people thinking?? i have no idea.... i wish i could help them.

-girls, i love wearing heels and i love the sound of heels on the floor, but if you CAN'T WALK IN THEM, DONT WEAR THEM. please and thank you.  biggest pet peeve: girls who can't walk in heels, yet still wear them.  why????

-some people i have to question if thats their mom or their girlfriend that's holding their hand...

-those pants are way TOO HIGH... those pants are way TOO LOW.. where are YOUR PANTS??

i'm quite embarrassed for some people that i see at the mall.  but they make my job more enjoyable.  so thank you to the weirdos that roam the mall. 

Tuesday, August 16, 2011


p.s. i wrote this yesterday but i didn't have time to finish it until today. so the days are a little off.

ever since we were little we always said that we would grow up, move out together, and go to college together.  plans change.  that is definitely not what is happening now.  the time has come.  we have grown up and starting college.  but we are going our seperate ways.  i will be in hair school until december, so i am  staying right here in good old O Town.  but her, she is going away.  to a small town.  cedar city, where she will be attending suu.  i am really jealous of her.  new town, new place to live, new friends, new shcool, etc.  she basically gets to start a new life.  i wish i was doing that.  at least she is only going to be 3 hours away from me.  which means, ROAD TRIPS!  obviously i will be going down there a lot to see her. (well as much as she will allow me to..)  and she will come up to see her family (i am a part of her family).  i feel like it was yesterday when she said she has 53 days till she leaves.  (she definitely had a count down on her phone).  but today, it says 2 days left.  2 days?? am i dying right now? yes. yes i am.  i honestly don't think it will hit me untill thursday when i go to call her after school to do something, and she's not there..  she is not my best friend.  she is my sister.  always has been, always will be.  even though we will be living about 216.7 miles away from each other.  i am going to miss this girl.  a whole lot.  i do everything with her.  it is going to be so different when she leaves.  i will still have some of my best friends here, which will help me.  we have been through a lot together.  not having her by my side when i need her will be the hardest part of all this.  i know she is only a phone call away, but its not the same.  for the last few months people keep asking her about college and when she leaves and everything.  i get upset everytime and tell them not to talk about it in front of me.  i think i'm in denial.  but really.  i didn't want to bring it up untill it got closer.  its not an easy thing for me to have her leave.  i may be sad and upset about her leaving, but i am so happy for her.  she is so independant and she will do great on her own.  she is a strong girl and knows what she wants in life.  i am not worried about her one bit.  well that might be a lie... she always jokes about getting a tatoo and getting prego.  that would not be okay! i know none of that would happen.  so i really am not worried about her.  she says she doesn't wanna get married til she is 21 or 22.  but i think maybe she will find the boy of her dreams down at suu and she will be getting married within the next year.  and she always yells at me when i say that i wanna get married soon.  watch, it will happen, she will get married soon and i will be the one getting married at 25.  that would happen.  i sure hope it doesn't though.

who am i gonna borrow clothes from? whose closest will i go shopping in? who will i lend my clothes out to? who will i do glitter toes with on sundays? who will i laugh my face off, until i cry, with?  who will i do stupid things with?  who will i drive down the street waving at random people with?  who will i drive around meeting random hot guys with?  who will i have heart to hearts with?  who will i have sleepovers with?  who will i go to denny's at 2:30 in the morning with?  who will i go to del taco at midnight with?  who will i talk to about boys with? who will i fight about stupid things with? who will laugh at me when i'm trying to be funny?  who will laugh at her jokes that only i get? who who who? 

you may be wondering who this "she" girl is.. and most of you already have it figured out.  "she" is kirsten elizabeth oaks.  aka kirst.  my best friend for life, aka sister. when you hear "kirsten", you always hear "ali" following it.  its always "kirsten and ali".  two peas in a pod.  inseparable.  a package deal. you can't have one without the other.

for her birthday i made her a calendar.  we were both in every picture for each month, and then whoever had a birthday that month would also be in the picture with us.  also i gave her a necklace. i had it engraved.  on the front it has her favorite word; love.  on the back; k. a.  (our initials).  i also got myself a necklace.  on the front it has my favorite word; live.  on the back; a. k.  we both wear them everyday.  i never take it off.  this way, a part of her will always be with me.  and a part of me, with her.  its special to me.  she gave me a really cute ring for my birthday.  i wear it all the time.  i don't take it off ever.  its sterling silver, so it doesn't turn my finger all green.  i usually don't like wearing rings when i do hair, but this one doesn't bother me at all. the ring and the necklace will remind me of her each day.  i am glad i have something like this to have while she is gone.  i hope that being so far away from each other will bring us closer than ever. 

kirst is amazing and i love her to death.  she has always been here for me no matter what.  yes, we fight.  but it always brings us closer.  i know i can still count on her to be my sister when she is gone.  and she can count on me to do the same.  i want to be the one she calls when she kisses a boy down there.  or when she falls in love.  or when her roomates are bitchin about stuff.  i want to be the one she calls when she is homesick and misses her friends and family back home.  i want to be here for her when she needs me.  but, i want her to need me.  we will see how all this goes.  i love you kirsten elizabeth.  this isn't goodbye.  just cya later.  and hopefully its sooner than later.    


Monday, August 15, 2011

just something new.

i need something new and fresh to happen in my life. 

i'm sick of the same old days.

i want to meet new friends.

i want to move out.

i want to go to college now.

i want to dance again.

new is what i want.

when do i get that?

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

what's your story?

every person has a story.  we all have heard the old saying, "don't judge a book by its cover." well its totally true.  each person has their own story, and unless we look past the cover and open it up and read, then we aren't giving anyone a chance.  you don't know if that girl with the smile on her face is faking that smile or not.  i'm sure we have all faked a smile before.  i know i have.  i do it often.  it definitely is not fun.  just because someone is rude to you, don't be rude back.  you don't know if they've had a hard day and are happening to take it out on you.  which is completely unfair, but it happens.  i just don't think everyone gets the chance they deserve.  be a friend to everyone and always make people feel good.  don't tear people down just cause you are having a hard time.  they could be too.  open up to those you love and trust.  if you have to fake it, then fake it til you make it.  judging others is pointless. cause honestly, you have NO IDEA what is going on in their life.  we all have struggles and trials.  sometimes you think your trials are so much harder than others, and sometimes you feel like other people have it harder than you.  but God gave us all trials, only to become stronger people.  my trials are different than yours, but what i get, i can handle. what you get, you can handle.  we will never be faced with something that we can't get through.  so lets all be a friend to everyone and be there for someone when they need you.  don't judge. just love.  the smallest things can make the biggest difference.  lets just make sure we are making those big differences something good.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Monday, August 8, 2011

thank you.

sometimes all you need is a little chat with the best friend. 

                             thanks car.

you've just got to remember.... everything happens for a reason.

Friday, August 5, 2011

lunch date.

last wednesday i was able to go to lunch with Lori, my birth mom.  she brougth her cute little girls.  my half sisters:)  i love being able to say that.  Macee and London are their names.  Macee is 4 and London is 1.  so they don't really know exactly who i am, but one day they will understand.  they are so adorable.  i was so glad i was able to meet them.  i already have such a strong love for them.  we met at Zupa's for lunch.  it was yummy.  i couldn't stop smiling and being so happy. we just talked and i got to talk to the girls.  it was a blast.  i love being with Lori.  i know i just met her a month ago, but i honestly feel like i've known her forever.. i love that feeling.  Lori said that i could do her hair next time she gets it done.  i am stoked!! i love doing hair so much.  and when i do people i know and love, it's even better!  she told me she wants to go chocolate brown.  i said i could do that.  it may sound super dumb, but i was a little sad when she said that.  we look so much alike already, but if she changed her hair, then we wouldn't as much.  well our eyes, and nose, and teeth, and everything is basically identical.  but i love that we are both blondies!  she told me just the other day that she wants to stay blonde this time.  so i am very happy about that:)  she invited me to a bbq in a couple weeks with her husbands family.  of course i said yes! i love meeting new people.  i can already tell that her and her husbands family loves me.  and i am so blessed to have them all in my life.  i'm overwhelmed with joy and excitement to be able to meet them.  soon i will get to meet all of her family as well.  how exciting:)  so much has happened and continues to happen in my life right now.  i am enjoying every minute of it.  i have an amazing family who raised me and loves me to death.  and i have an amazing birth mom who gave me the opportunity to live and grow up in a family so amazing.  thank you Lori for your great strength and endless love.  thank you to my dear family who has raised me and put up with me all these years.  i don't know what i'd do without any of these people in my life.   i love you all.

me and the girls:)

i love them all so much:)

where have you gone?

has summer come and gone already?  or do i just feel this way because my tan lines are simply disappearing?  since it is only the end of July, i will have to go with choice number two.  at the beginning of the summer i was able to visit seven peaks water park after school most days.  now with my new job, i never have a spare moment for my second home.  the past few summers i have spent at seven peaks with my best friend kirsten.  now this summer has been completely different.  with us growing up and being, what they call "adults" now, summer just isn't quite the same.  i can't complain too much though, i am making money, which is always needed.  i was missing the sunshine a whole lot the other day, and so on my day off (i get one day off every month from hair school, usually the last wednesday of the month) on wednesday, after i went to the gym i decided to put on my swimsuit and layout on my tramp.  i didn't have enough time to go to peaks, so the tramp would have to do.  i got a little bit of color.  but if you saw me, you would not believe me.  it's sad, i know.  when i drink a smoothie, it helps me feel like it's summertime just a little bit.  so today on my way home from school and on my way to work, i stopped at jamba juice and got a smoothie. yummmmmmy.  so as i'm sitting here waiting for someone to come buy a dang cute blanket from me, i sip away on my jamba and eat my bread from great harvest.  dear summer, please find me again. i miss you.